Metta Mediation is a loving-kindness meditation practice, which brings about positive attitudinal change by wishing happiness, safety, peace, and ease to first yourself, then a loved one, and lastly, someone who has brought you pain or sadness.
This style of meditation is unique in the sense that you draw positive energy from within yourself, and by extending it to someone who you find easy to care about, you discover strength to send it to the negative individuals in your life – since ultimately, they are the ones who need it the most.
I have recently discovered this to be a way of healing the troubled mind to free it from its pain and confusion. Of all Buddhist meditations, Metta Mediation is really magical in changing our heavy and persistent negative patterns of our thoughts.
The true power of Metta Meditation hit me when I was studying to become a yoga teacher
As we began, it was easy to think of sending a loved one happiness, safety, peace and ease. It made me tear up as I resisted to send myself the same. And lastly, to send someone who has HURT you the same happiness, safety, peace, and ease was the most challenging. (Barf).
A couple previous lovers raced through my mind, and with them brought heavy emotions and painful pangs of heartbreak. Then, there I was, thinking about my very first boyfriend from high school years and years ago. I thought I had moved on from everything he put me through. The person I loved and trusted was mentally and physically abusive. He was the root to a myriad of warped body issues, including bulimia and anorexia-nervosa. It was the source to my self-loathing, and the distorted concept of what a relationship should be. I was trapped in that trauma for three years.
The silver lining? I eventually built up the strength and courage to move to a new city, where I pieced together a new foundation for my life, found yoga, and today live a much more beautiful life. In this moment, through Metta Mediation, I finally found myself at peace. As for him, the universe works in mysterious ways. From an unfortunate result of a drunken bar fight, he is now brain dead, paralyzed in a wheel chair.
To be honest, when I first heard I thought good, there’s your karma. But I had not realized until practicing Metta Meditation that I was still holding on to all of that heaviness and hatred and dragging it through my life like a heavy, over-packed suitcase. YUCK. Sending him happiness, safety, peace, and ease was nauseating at first, but I did it. Every day I did it more and more I began to feel lighter, brighter, and gradually at ease with him and what he put me through. It has allowed me to bring acceptance to my past and leave it there as if it had evaporated.
Through sending him thoughts of peace and happiness, I sent even more peace and most importantly, love to myself. I am free.